Saturday, April 8, 2017

Picking Up the Pieces

Today would be one month since Jeff was killed.  Every day seems to be a challenge, while I try to pick up the pieces of life.  The AA has been ill, I had to put her in the hospital with pneumonia again, and so life has taken another turn.  She was released on Wednesday, and my days have been filled with medications, oxygen tanks, and trying to keep her calm.

I still haven't written all of my thank you notes, it is hard.  I only get one or two written a day, there are many tears, and memories of Jeff sharing about each and every one of his friends and co-workers. 

I have tried to sew, but I was afraid of trying to cut anything because I am so distracted.  I did fix my curtain for the family room, but I can't put it up.  The hardware is missing.  I did buy a new rod, now just to have a few moments, to retrieve the ladder, install new hardware, and do it.

I have received some lovely care packages.  I am hoping to get my quilting mojo back.  Having the time to just sit and sew even for only a few minutes helps immensely. 

Nancy from Pug Mom Quilts sent me lovely flowers.  On gorgeous blue fabrics.


Dawn at Sew You Quilt 2 sent a care package.

A lovely table runner of Kaffe Fassett prints.  Of course Lucy claimed it as her own.
Gorgeous fabric.  Love the chicken, barn, and windmill.  Jeff's favorite things.
A get well pillowcase for the Ancient Aunt.
A mug rug of selvages. 
And a To Do list which I keep plenty of these to keep track of what I need to get accomplished every day.  It helps me focus right now.

Cheryl of Cheryl's Teapots 2 Quilting sent me some books.  I am looking forward to some time to sit down and read.
Recently I bought this book by Jen Kingwell  called Long Time Gone after seeing Kris's blocks for a QAL from Kris Love's Fabric I knew I had to make a quilt using the pattern leaflet.

I know I have shared that Jeff loved antique John Deere tractors, he had rebuilt and sold or donated a couple previously.  He had two that he was currently working on.  He at one time had handed me a bunch of shirts and asked me to make a quilt for him. 
I kept putting it off.   Just a short time before he died, he asked me why I hadn't made him a t-shirt quilt out of his shirts.  I told him I am afraid of messing them up.  He chuckled and said they are just a bunch of old t-shirts, heck honey you think nothing of cutting up fabric that cost $18 a yard, but you won't cut up a bunch of old raggedy shirts?  I guess it is time.  I started by cutting off of the collars, sleeves, and all the different motifs.  I think my next step is to measure all of the different motifs then design a quilt.  

I thank everyone for your continued prayers and for checking on me.  Those prayers and well wishes have helped me through more times than I can count. 









14 comments:

sewyouquilt2 said...

You are thought of more than you know. wishing that I lived closer to give you hugs and help make things a little easier. just make sure you take care of YOU. sometimes a half hour bubble bath away from the world can do a world of wonders.....hugs cant wait to see the tee quilt. I have one to make too out of Celtics tees that were my husband's brothers.

Carol- Beads and Birds said...

I've been thinking about you and each time I say a prayer that life will get a little easier each day. Grief is a hard thing and has it's own timetable. Maybe the T-Shirt quilt is just what you need. Don't worry if you work slowly. Hope your Aunt recovers quickly.
xx, Carol

Carol S. said...

Making a John Deere quilt out of his shirts sounds like a good project to focus on, though I imagine there will be tons of tears as you reminisce over each shirt. Carol from Beads and Birds is so right when she said, "grief is a hard thing and has it's own timetable." I find it insulting when I hear people tell someone who is grieving that it is "time to get over it." You'll never get over it, but how you feel will change each day. Love you sweet friend and think of you every day.

Lesley said...

Oh, so nice to hear from you, and yes, will continue to keep you in my thoughts. It must be so comforting to you to receive such sweet care packages...if only a hug could be sent through the mail! The t-shirt quilt will be pretty special to you, as those wonderful memories surround you. Like the others have said, take time for you and don't worry about a time table. Hugs!

Julierose said...

Great to see a post from you again; hang in there, you are doing so well, despite the fact that you feel you are not...know that we allare praying for you to come through this...a tee shirt quilt will be marvelous and awonderful memory...hugs, Julierose

Carla said...

I think of you everyday and send hugs and prayers. Focusing on that quilt for him sounds like a good project. Feeling like you have no focus is only natural. It sounds like just doing a few things here and there helps, but no one would ever think you can just get back to normal. Take your time to focus on you and what helps get you through the day. God bless you and your care for AA.

krislovesfabric said...

Sending love and prayers to you this morning sweet friend. Hope the sun is shining and your yard is drying as mine is this morning. Hear we are scheduled for more rain tonight, argh!! I think your tee shirt quilt sounds like a great project. And will give you time to both grieve and time to celebrate too. Glad to hear AA is doing better.

Raewyn said...

I wondered how you were getting on. It sounds like making the quilt could be great therapy for you, and something to wrap yourself in when you need to. Sending you hugs.

Ioleen Kimmel said...

The quilt sounds like a wonderful idea. We all grieve in our own way. I think of you often. If there is anything I can do just let me know.

barbara woods bewtjw@gmail.com said...

We love you Hang in there

Cathy said...

I am thrilled to see the lovely packages you received and happy to read you take a little time for sewing. Hope the AA heals quickly. You are always in my thoughts and prayers.

Needled Mom said...

I'm sure every day is a challenge, Colette. Don't worry about what is not getting done at this time. Some days just breathing in and out is enough. I'm so glad to see that so many have been sending mail hugs to you.

It sounds as though the John Deere quilt is exactly what you need to make. It will provide such comfort for you when completed too.

Cheryl's Teapots2Quilting said...

I started re-reading the first Mrs. Pollifax book last night, and was thinking of you while I read. I hope you like them. Take everything one day at at time. Hope the AA gets better quickly.

Scrapatches said...

Hold dear to John Deere and take it one stitch at a time ... {{{{{{{{{hugs and healing}}}}}}}}} <3 Pat