Picking Up the Pieces

Today would be one month since Jeff was killed.  Every day seems to be a challenge, while I try to pick up the pieces of life.  The AA has been ill, I had to put her in the hospital with pneumonia again, and so life has taken another turn.  She was released on Wednesday, and my days have been filled with medications, oxygen tanks, and trying to keep her calm.

I still haven't written all of my thank you notes, it is hard.  I only get one or two written a day, there are many tears, and memories of Jeff sharing about each and every one of his friends and co-workers. 

I have tried to sew, but I was afraid of trying to cut anything because I am so distracted.  I did fix my curtain for the family room, but I can't put it up.  The hardware is missing.  I did buy a new rod, now just to have a few moments, to retrieve the ladder, install new hardware, and do it.

I have received some lovely care packages.  I am hoping to get my quilting mojo back.  Having the time to just sit and sew even for only a few minutes helps immensely. 

Nancy from Pug Mom Quilts sent me lovely flowers.  On gorgeous blue fabrics.

Dawn at Sew You Quilt 2 sent a care package.

A lovely table runner of Kaffe Fassett prints.  Of course Lucy claimed it as her own.

Gorgeous fabric.  Love the chicken, barn, and windmill.  Jeff's favorite things.

A get well pillowcase for the Ancient Aunt.

A mug rug of selvages. 

And a To Do list which I keep plenty of these to keep track of what I need to get accomplished every day.  It helps me focus right now.

Cheryl of Cheryl's Teapots 2 Quilting sent me some books.  I am looking forward to some time to sit down and read.

Recently I bought this book by Jen Kingwell  called Long Time Gone after seeing Kris's blocks for a QAL from Kris Love's Fabric I knew I had to make a quilt using the pattern leaflet.

I know I have shared that Jeff loved antique John Deere tractors, he had rebuilt and sold or donated a couple previously.  He had two that he was currently working on.  He at one time had handed me a bunch of shirts and asked me to make a quilt for him. 

I kept putting it off.   Just a short time before he died, he asked me why I hadn't made him a t-shirt quilt out of his shirts.  I told him I am afraid of messing them up.  He chuckled and said they are just a bunch of old t-shirts, heck honey you think nothing of cutting up fabric that cost $18 a yard, but you won't cut up a bunch of old raggedy shirts?  I guess it is time.  I started by cutting off of the collars, sleeves, and all the different motifs.  I think my next step is to measure all of the different motifs then design a quilt.  

I thank everyone for your continued prayers and for checking on me.  Those prayers and well wishes have helped me through more times than I can count.