Friday, February 28, 2014

Voice Versus Choice

(Disclaimer)  I do have to voice my opinion about something I have been seeing lately that I find kind of disturbing. 

Having a voice is why many people blog.  It is a way to share what we love, and the craziness of our lives.  There are times that people post to share whatever is going on be it a win, loss, learning experience, joy or sorrow.  I have noticed lately that many people have a disclaimer on their blog that the opinions given are purely their own.  Just that an "opinion".

My grammar, punctuation, and spelling are not always perfect, and not many people are perfect.  Some people blog throughout the day, creating several posts.  Others once a day, or a couple of times a week.  As far as I know none of us have an Editor to review our posts.  For some coming up with anything they consider "interesting" is a struggle, and for others it is free flowing.  But the one thing we all have in common is that we are putting ourselves out there.  Everyone may not have the perfect points, best matching seams, loveliest color choices but we all take the time to share little parts of proudly. 

Leaving a comment is a voice for those of us that follow other bloggers.  Be it the "Rock Stars" of the quilting world, the "lesser known but extremely talented supporting actors" and some of us mere mortals (we are the expendable crew member from Star Trek) that hope to become better piecers, quilters, and designers. But having a voice does not give us (those that leave comments)  permission to be mean, critical or condescending.....or my ultra favorite---super whiney when someone presents a free pattern.

While everyone has been more that sweet, lovely, and kind when leaving comments on my blog, I have seen others that are actually cringe worthy.

Example 1:

Lady (A)  was commenting on a sewing machine that she rented at a retreat.  She struggled with the machine and in her opinion it did not meet her expectations of what it said it could do (also she did state in the opening line of her post this was only her opinion based upon her experience). Can you believe that someone had the unmitigated nerve to tell her that it was her inexperience with the machine and that it was USER ERROR! Then the person went on to rant and rave how it was the best machine on the market and if she had been trained to use it she would have not had all the problems with it, and how wrong she was.  Funny thing is that other people who owned that brand of machine in the comments had agreed with the lady (A) who had posted-- that the feature did not work as it was supposed to even on their machines after "training". 

Example 2:

Someone misspelled the name of a city in their blog.  Oh my the comment that was posted was scathing about using spell checker, learning their geography etc.

Mistakes are made people, spell check does not always work.  Our oldest daughter who has a Master's degree in English posted a comment not too long ago--  I am thankful for my cooking jeans that I inherited from my mother.  LOL  Obviously Spell check FAIL!

I know these are just a couple of small examples and if you read blogs you may know exactly who I am talking about and their blogs.

Maybe I am wrong, and again this is only my opinion but just because we do not agree with someone's post,  or that they made a mistake, does not give us the right to be mean, or cruel.  If you do not not like someone's writing style--maybe that is not the blog for you to be reading.  If someone makes a mistake instead of blasting them in the comments, maybe you should "take it offline" meaning send them a short e-mail explaining their error but do not deride them for it.  Or better yet, shrug your shoulders and giggle- chalk it up to an off day. 

When bloggers want your opinion on a color choice, layout, fabric choice they will ask for it and believe me the readers will give it!  Which is what is so great about blogging and sharing.

Finally a question.  If you were at a guild meeting, at a seminar, or met that blogger in person would you stand up/walk up to them and tell them they are stupid or ignorant because you did not agree with their opinion, or they made a grammatical/spelling error in front of other people?  How do you think it makes them feel?  Also how would you feel if someone did the same to you?

We are here to lift people up, cheer them on, and bend a knee and our head in prayer when they have sorrow and needs. Not to bring people down, and if I have ever left a comment which was not kind or encouraging I apologize profusely.


  1. Well said. I try to always have a kind word to say on blog posts. You are so right about how we would act differently in front of that person than on the internet. I really don't understand why people have to be so mean.
    If I have ever hurt your feelings I apologize. And if I ever do please be sure to tell me because it would not ever be my intention.
    I am reminded of the golden rule about how we are to treat others even with our words. None of us are perfect.

  2. Hear, hear. As "they" say,
    "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all".
    I know that when we blog, we are opening ourselves up to comments, but I too have seen some really hurtful or even rude ones at times. I always want to say "it's time to lighten up, people." (Can't remember where that quote came from, sorry.

  3. I totally agree, so far I have not had any unkind comments left on my blog, which surprises me because I am definitely not perfect and very opinionated! LOL


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